Rings and Other Things

With all that's going on this week, my mind is swirling. Between Iran, and chocolate, and the State of the State, I just don't know what to write tonight.

I think that's a sign I should just take things down a notch and have some fun with this post.

While listening to Charlie today, I heard an interesting debate about engagement rings. It seemed to light up the phone lines, because the callers were rolling in with their various opinions, some in support, some in protest. Not an earth shattering topic, I know, but I guess I feel like writing about it for the same reason it got so many calls: It's a guy's opinion vs girl's opinion kind of thing, and anyone who knows me also knows I just can't stop myself.

For those of you who may have missed the show, the debate began because one of Charlie's friends told him that he and his girlfriend had gone to look at engagement rings over the weekend. Charlie didn't understand why any couple would see this as a joint venture. In his opinion, the guy should suck it up, buy the ring on his own and then pop question.

While I do have respect for this approach, as a woman I'd like to say that it seems much more appropriate to me to have the opportunity to weigh in on something that will be gracing your hand for the rest of your life.

And what's more, can you imagine a worse nightmare than the person you want to spend your entire life with handing you the most god awful ring in the universe? Men may not understand this, but when it comes to cut, a woman would prefer a much smaller diamond in her favorite cut than a monster diamond in a cut she hates. It's true. Take my word for it. So back off on the whole "materialistic" thing. I know you were going there. It's a preference thing that reflects taste and not necessarily karat.

Furthermore, I've been told that the marquis cut is notorious for getting caught on things, whereas the princess cut is much more functional. I bet Charlie never thought about that, did he? Functionality is also a factor!

And lastly, a girl spends her whole life acquiring jewelry. She refines her taste. She changes from yellow gold to white. From pearls to diamonds. It's something her mom teaches her about when she's young and something she dreams about when she thinks of her future wedding day. Her favorite kind of jewelry becomes not unlike a guy's favorite kind of car, for example. And she develops an opinion on it, a strong one even...kinda like the Ford guy. You know the guy, a Ford guy that absolutely hates Dodge? The guy with the sticker of Calvin pissing on a Ram? That guy.

If his girlfriend promised him for years that she'd buy him a brand new truck the day they got engaged, and on that day he opened his eyes to find a shiny Dodge Ram sitting in the driveway, he'd cringe at it! He would! But would that make him a jerk for not appreciating the gift? Or does that mean that he doesn't appreciate their love? Absolutely not. Can he be blamed for years and years of mental development that predisposed him to react a certain way? Hardly. Neither can the girl who upon seeing an engagement ring that looks to her like the Dodge Ram does to our aforementioned friend.

That being said, I think it's appropriate for a guy who wants to buy an engagement ring for his girlfrield to at least have an idea of what she likes. I'm not saying he should take her to the store, pick out a ring, buy it and propose right there. That would be a good thing gone bad.

Ideal situation: Guy and girl look at rings together. Guy never mentions it again. Guy goes off on his own accord, using the knowledge he acquired from the visit to the ring store to pick out a ring in the style he knows she likes, but that also reflects his personality. Guy buys a ring. Then, guy comes up with an incredibly, impossibly romantic way of giving said ring to said girlfriend, probably resulting in tears of joy and happiness at how such a beautiful moment was made more so by the perfect ring.

Seriously though, that's all I'm gonna say.