Completely Unresearched Commentary

I am going to take a moment to sit back and, using my everyday mind, think about the conceptions of marriage I've come across in all my 27 (almost 28!) years.

I've heard of:

Ceremonious marriages that took place out of obligation (See Seth marrying his brother's wife on Deadwood")

Two heterosexuals embarking on a life together marriage (like my brother and his wife)

Arranged marriages (like my Irianian friend's parents)

Re-marriages (like the one my mom had after my dad passed away)

Un-marriages (this refers to most of my friend's parents)

Marriages over the internet (Russian bride, anyone??)

Marriages to more than one person at the same time (Muslims, Mormons, etc.)

Vegas marriages (Oops I did it again! Thanks, Britney!)

Green Card marriages (see the movie Green Card)

The kind of marriage you get when you don't actually get married, but live together so long the government considers you married (or is that just in Illinois?)

Come to think of it, I've heard of just about any kind of marriage. And that's without conferring Yahoo. So, can someone inform me what this big to-do is about the "institute" of marriage everyone seems so hell-bent over?

I can't seem to figure out what that is to begin with.