Saturday, September 30, 2006

Red

Are you a red head?

Were you at a somewhat classy bar on Water Street Friday night?

I should have said hi, but I didn't.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
Weirdo

(By the way, Ask Me Later is now officially Casper's online pick-up joint.)

West of January

This certainly isn't going to help my standing as a non-geek, but I'd like to recommend a book.

Buzz recently loaned me his copy of Dave Duncan's West of January, and I have to say it was an enjoyable and somewhat enlightening read, particularly when it all wraps up at the end. If you've ever speculated on how we got where we are now, or where we may end up, this is a good start, or, at least, one of many, in figuring it out.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Behind Enemy Lines

Maybe that's too strong. How about a "supreme act of diplomacy?"

Yeah, that sounds good.

Either way, last night I, along with Buzz and a somewhat willing co-worker, took an extreme leap of faith and headed out to Milwaukee's gathering of Drinking Liberally. There I had the pleasure (and I mean that) of meeting Stacy Rosenzweig, one of DL's co-founders, the infamous Jay Bullock and a slurry of other pinko-commie-tree-hugging-liberals.

I kid. Seriously, I kid.

As an added bonus, Don Holt, Republican candidate for Milwaukee County Sheriff, was also in attendance. When you think about it, it was kind of surreal.

One thing I took away from my journey to the other side was how similar the Drinking Liberally crowd is to the Drinking Right gang.

You see, we all drink.

And when it comes right down to it, isn't that what it's all about?

Seriously, though, it was a good time, and I would encourage any and all to attend should they get the opportunity.

Just note, they don't get free pizza.

I'm also sayin...

Google sucks. And so does Blogger.

And that's all I have to say tonight.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

I'm Just Sayin...

Breaking news from Reuters:

Too much testosterone kills brain cells

Who knew?

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Gettin' the Good Stuff

"They [Willie Nelson] had a pound and a half on the bus, for five people. That's close to five ounces per person. With the quality I have access to, I could expect that to last two years even if my only abstention was during Lent, and these days I'm taking other long breaks. With the stuff Willie no doubt gets, which if I had I'd save for Friday nights with nothing major planned for Saturday, it would last me forever. They probably to go thru most of it before the tour was over. I really wouldn't care to get that swacko, but the the fact that he does, and remains a productive, contributing member of society is pretty good evidence that our nation's drug policy is unnecessary."

Most of Triticale's post on Willie Nelson's recent drug bust and reason why some anonymous bloggers are anonymous.
Also the most logical argument for anything anywhere in the history of all mankind!

Sunday, September 24, 2006

New Word

Boozemonger.

Use it in place of bartender.

Two out of two bartenders...er...boozemongers agree.

Clinton on FOX

There's enough analysis of Bill Clinton's appearance on Fox News Sunday going around to fill a book, so I'll try to keep this brief.

Clinton came into the interview with a chip on his shoulder, and probably the expectation that he would be able to put Fox in its place by saying all the things he perceives so many liberals want to regarding Fox's conservative leanings. The problem is, he didn't say anything new. He sounded like so many messages from the left, particularly when it came to using the neocon tag and pointing out Fox's supposed bias.

I would expect that from the rank and file, but a part of me always thought he was above that, at least in front of the press.

Guess not.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

For immediate release!

Uber-Candidate Calls for Return of all Campaign Contributions

For Immediate Release-Saturday, September 23rd, 2006
Contact David Casper at casperaskmelater@yahoo.com

SHOREWOOD - "I don't believe Mark Green did anything illegal in transferring federal campaign contributions to his statewide campaign for governor, but it goes to show how out of control the election process has become when it comes to big bucks. Politicians aren't buying their ways into power, but they are being bought."

Candidate for everything David Casper today announced his support for Wisconsin gubernatorial candidate Mark Green in his challenge of the State Election Board's order that his campaign return contributions transferred from his federal warchest to the state election. Citing an obviously partisan decision influenced by incumbent Jim Doyle's campaign, Casper stated that Green shouldn't be punished as the result of a political maneuver guised as objective decision making.

However, Casper also pointed out that while this flow of funds may have been legal, it's a reminder that far too often the size of a candidate's wallet seems more important than the content of his or her character.

"No candidate should even be in the position where it appears they may have been bought. Campaign contributions, no matter how big or small, or with what intentions they're given or used, will always suffer from a perceived impropriety. I think voters and our nation as a whole would be better served if donations were eliminated altogether," said Casper, a ruggedly good looking first-time write-in candidate for everything.

Casper is proposing that all candidates return the contributions or donate them to charity and limit their campaigning to $50 or less.

"You'd be amazed by what some posterboard and glitter paint can do."

In limiting campaign accounts, Casper further believes candidates will be forced to get out and "press the flesh." It will bring them closer to the people they hope to represent and make them discuss the issues and support their stances rather than inundating airwaves with catch-phrases and attack messages.

Casper isn't holding his breath, though.

"All of these politicians these days are so addicted to the money I doubt they'd ever consider giving it back or moderating the amounts. They're like crack addicts. But with money. Some sort of money addict. What are they doing with all of it? I'll tell you what, you can buy a lot of crack with that sort of money."

David Casper has vowed to lead by example and keep his campaign spending to a tenth of his proposed $50 limit.

-30-
Authorized and NOT Paid for by Casper for Everything, David Casper, Treasurer

Thursday, September 21, 2006

You gotta know when to quote them...

Fergie showed up on TRL on Monday and had to be stuck up and wear a bra, ruining the only reason I would ever willingly click on a Fergie picture. Man, God
really must hate her. She has a body built for sex, but a head that Jeffrey
Dahmer would've been too grossed out to keep in his house. She may as well be a
minotaur. At least then she'd have horns. Horns are cool.


-Todd, from IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com, about Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas.

Kane Watch: Taking a Risk

It's not Eugene taking the risk, it's me. Tell you why in a moment.

Today the Journal-Sentinel published a story outlining the lending gap between minorities and whites in Milwaukee, one of the widest in the country.

Of course a story like this was bound to grab the attention of Eugene Kane, who, in a blog post states:

Read the story and you'll see the main reason the rate of blacks being
denied for mortgage loans is relatively so high in this area is that the rate of
white folks who get turned down is so darn low.

That suggests many whites in our area get approved simply because they're
white, not because they all have excellent credit ratings.

Because as most reasonable people can agree, black folks aren't the only
people with bad credit.

BUZZ! Wrong!

Why?

First, let me interject here why I consider making this post a "risk." Very rarely do I discuss work around here. But it just so happens that the subject of this story is something I'm incredibly familiar with because of what I do for a living. Coincidentally, just last week I wrapped up a lengthy project in which nearly one million home loan applications were analyzed to determine the reasons behind discrepancies in approvals between minorities and whites.

So let's just say, for once, I know what I'm talking about.

Kane derives from the story that whites receive preferential lending treatment simply because they're white. While he's certainly correct in stating that white people have bad credit too, his conclusion that whites should therefore experience equal reject rates is laughable. The fact is that a far greater proportion on non-white borrowers skew toward lower credit ratings. Furthermore, not only the credit score is used in making a lending decision. Both the debt-to-income and loan-to-value ratios play a large role in whether or not a borrower is approved. As with credit ratings, DTIs and LTVs disproportionately skew toward riskier levels when it comes to minorities. Time after time, no matter how the numbers were crunched, it was clear that a layering of risk among minority borrowers resulted in their inability to secure a loan.

Another thing Kane, and anyone else ready to use this story as an indication of racism among lenders, should be aware of is that the loan approval process is highly automated. Automated underwriting systems are designed to look at a variety of factors, none of which are race, to arrive at a decision on the loan. For the most part, mortgage brokers and lenders dealing directly with the borrower are far removed from even the manual processes involved in approving a loan. When they are involved, it's usually them bending over backwards to get a borrower into a loan because they are motivated by sales. Quite frequently, they find themselves up against quantifiable data regarding the transaction that simply doesn't support approving the loan.

So, is Kane right when he says it's easier to get a loan if you're white? Yes...and the numbers support it.

Is he right in implying it's easier to get the loan because you're white? Absolutely not...and the numbers support that as well.

Doyle's Goin Down!

JSOnline has a major story about Diamond Jim today. While it's nothing we didn't already really know, it takes intuition and makes it fact.

Attorney Michael S. Maistelman bluntly told Democratic Party members of the board he contacted why they should publicly sanction or punish the Green campaign, according to documents obtained by the Journal Sentinel under the state's open records law.

"Even if this ends up in Court it is a PR victory for us since it makes Green spend money and have to defend the use of his Washington DC dirty money," Maistelman said in a 9:31 a.m. e-mail one day before the vote. He sent the message to Carl Holborn and Kerry Dwyer, board members appointed by Democratic leaders of the Legislature.

Sweet goodness. Oh yeah, Doyle's campaign just released a new ethics ad today. Check it out.

Too perfect.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Dominicans on Crack

This one really irritates me. Dominica is my confirmation name, for the love of God. Now, the Dominicans have to go saying something like,

The Dominican mission in Cairo also criticized Benedict's words, saying he chose a text for his speech that "revived the polemics of the past."

"These comments, seen by many Muslims as hurtful, risk encouraging extremists on all sides," it said in a statement, "and put in danger all the advances in dialogue made in recent decades."

Let's get one thing straight: No one is responsible for any extremist behavior except for those who engage in it. The pope is no more responsible for any death pertaining to this overreaction than any cartoonist was in drawing Mohammad.

Why does the rest of the world continue to make excuses for the unreasonable, irrational and deadly responses that Muslim nations have to other countries expressions of free thought and free speech?

Am I taking crazy pills here? Obviously, the pope's words do not have the power to incite the masses. Nope. Sorry. Don't buy it. However, if Muslim leaders around the world were looking for the next wave of villagers to exploit, well then they can just use the pope's words to fuel the fire.

This has nothing to do with Catholics versus Muslims or any ancient words from any ancient texts. This has everything to do with the nature of Muslim "leaders" to exploit their own people in the name of something greater. In the name of a religion of peace.

You show me an Ayatollah in the trenches and then, maybe, just maybe I'll change my mind.

And while I'm at it, this is one bad-ass arch-bishop.

Clarification Requested

Hey Bullock, is this okay to call fascist?

Al-Qaida in Iraq and its allies said Muslims would be victorious and addressed the pope as "the worshipper of the cross," saying "you and the West are doomed as you can see from the defeat in Iraq, Afghanistan, Chechnya and elsewhere. ... We will break up the cross, spill the liquor and impose the 'jizya' tax, then the only thing acceptable is a conversion (to Islam) or (being killed by) the sword."

Wouldn't want to upset anyone who's worried that the murderous, freedom-hating group, that's already murdered thousands of Americans will be insulted at being called fascist.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Get Some!

Hugo Chavez recently commented on the US decision not to approve visas for his doctors or security detail in an attempt to speak before the United Nations.

Claimed Chavez, "If what they want is for me not to go, I may just appear and go out walking on the streets of New York. Maybe I'll go to the barrios of New York, the poor barrios."

All I have to say to that is: Bring it.

Remembering


My dad....5 years later....3 roses....
I miss you.

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent persons
and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Now That's Insulting

The pope decided not to apologize to the Muslims. Good for him. As a recovering Catholic, I take some pride in that.

It's not like what he said was that bad, anyway. I mean he could have gone the YAAFM route, after all. But he didn't! The pope is way too good for that.

I however, am not. Ask Me Later presents YAAFM, courtesy of ZipperFish.com. Enjoy.


Kane Watch: Do your homework, Gene

Eugene Kane wants to know why the media isn't screaming and yelling, at the top of their lungs, where were the parents of the kids at Green Bay East High School? No one, absolutely no one, he says is wondering about this. Specifically, he writes, "If these boys were residents of the central city of Milwaukee, I know this question would have been asked by now." Obviously, Gene, no one is asking that question because those kids were white.

Well, I mean, no one is asking that question except, oh I don't know...maybe...

"How could the parents not have known?" - Charlie Sykes, WTMJ-AM

"We'd like to know how they amassed such a large amount of weapons and nobody (parents) seemed to know." - Diane Alvers, WGBA-TV

"Parents Role Still Unknown" Title of a feature article in the Green Bay Press Gazette.

Nice try, Gene. Either you didn't do your homework or you want it to be the case that things are unbalanced and unfair. I'm putting my money on the latter.

S**T List Update

In all honesty, I'd rather there wasn't a S**T List. After all, that would mean I got great service everywhere I went. But the reality is that the world isn't perfect.

Neither is Bar Louie.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Silly Little Frenchman...They Hate You Anyway

If the French ever thought that not joining the war on terror (food for oil, anyone?) would somehow set them apart from other American allies, and make-happy the hate mongers of radical Islam, they can know for certain now that it didn't:

Al-Qaida has for the first time announced a union with an Algerian insurgent group that has designated France as an enemy, saying they will act together against French and American interests.

Now, I'm not French, but I had to wonder, why oh why would Al Qaida want to attack the peace-loving, pacifist French? I mean, other than the fact that Al Qaida wants to terrorize anyone who doesn't adhere to their rule (Hey Folkblum, that's fascism), the French should be the least of their worries, right?

Well, I got my answer from Anne Giudicelli, a former French diplomat specializing in the Middle East who runs the Paris-based consultancy Terrorisc. Here's what she had to say:

"The Americans have become harder to target domestically, so they are trying to widen the field of action and strike their allies," she said.

I hope you read that last sentence twice. That's an amazingly powerful statement. If Al Qaida can't hit us at home, they are going to hit our allies. Now, that's always been a given, but what's different now is that Al Qaida is directing their attention specifically away from the United States and to other countries. Admittedly, this doesn't bode well for France, but it sure speaks volumes to the steps the Bush administration has taken to protect this house.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Drinking Right: Phoning it in

Most of the time you'll get 100% out of me.

So don't complain when you only get 42.

Jeff Wagner to Join Drinking Right

Hi All! Be sure to join Casper and friends at Papa's social club for tomorrow's Drinking Right. This just in! Per this post, Mr. Jeff Wagner will be a special guest. Come early, as Jeff will only be available to hang out until he goes on-air to discuss the elections.

Monday, September 11, 2006

We Remember Dong Lee

Today we remember Dong Lee, a passenger aboard Flight 77 on September 11th, 2001.


Dong, a resident of Leesburg, VA, was 48 years old, an engineer for Boeing and is survived by a wife and three children.

From a memory of Mr. Lee:

...Dong Lee was a patriot who understood the value of this Nation's
security and the need to keep important information secure and had no qualms
about putting his intellect to the service of a company and his Nation. Capable,
knowledgeable and able to present ideas so that they could be quickly and easily
picked up and understood as concepts and fit into larger schema, all the while
being affable, courteous, outgoing and willing to discuss how these concepts
could be worked for other things.

Today, Dong Lee's family and friends, along with all the many others who suffered on 9/11, will be in our thoughts and prayers.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Jeff Wagner Rocks It Out Old School

I love this guy. Although I missed it when it was first posted, Wagner recently linked back to one of his old posts that laid out the ground rules for a Journal Sentinel drinking game. After reading it, I immediately thought the game alone should automatically name him a member-in-spirit of Drinking Right:

There is a modern day version of this game that you can play with the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Simply sit down with a group of friends and a week's worth of newspapers. Every time you find any of the following phrases: "conservative talk radio", "right-wing talk radio", "right-wing talk shows", "radio talkers" or anything similar - take a drink. Every time you find the phrase "squawk radio" (or any variation thereof), take two drinks. Since you don't want everybody to get too smashed too soon, you only take half a drink each time one of these terms appears in any piece written by MJS columnist Eugene Kane.

Brilliant!

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Budwieser Yah Hey There Der Packer Ad

Happy Football Season, everyone.

GO BEARS!!! Ha ha ha!

Friday, September 08, 2006

What do ABC and Kevin Barrett have in Common?

Apparently, both of them are telling lies, but I find it quite ironic that only one of them has the support of the left.

Interesting that when someone wants to tell conspiracy theories against Bush's presidency, the left calls it "freedom of speech," even if those theories have absolutely no bearing whatsoever in truth.

Yet, a filmmaker who wants to depict a story of how 9/11 came to happen is painted as the devil, and as a right-wing agenda-toting lackey. His "lies" which, surprisingly, are based on true events, I guess, not covered by the same freedom of speech that the left so generously lends to the Kevin Barrett's of the world.

Is anyone else bothered by the fact that those who would condemn this movie have either not seen it at all, or have only seen half of it? According to the film's writer, the mistakes of both Clinton and Bush's handling of Bin Laden are pointed out. Yet, the left wants to frame this movie as having a rightwing motive.

It's a shame that ABC is bending to the pressure. According to Sean Hannity's show tonight, edits are being made in response to the backlash that has resulted from the freedom-of-speech loving liberals.

Where is the ACLU on this one? Probably busy writing more hate mail to the Path to 9/11 blog.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Bar Blogging

Buzz and I are sitting in a bar right now, um, y'know, practicing for the next Drinking Right.

And that reminded me of a conversation we had the last time we were in a bar, um, practicing.

If you haven't seen Superman Returns, here's a warning that there's spoilers ahead.

Okay...here it comes.

Turns out Superman is a daddy.

Which got me thinking...

The human female body has natural defenses to male sperm, thus insuring that the strongest cell makes it through natures original obstacle course.

But these are SUPER sperm!

Think about it!

Which makes me wonder what would happen if Superman tried to wear a condom.

Kane Watch: Don't Watch

For some time now I've noticed a trend when it comes to Eugene Kane. Quite often, when stories of crime in Milwaukee hit the news, Kane has a tendency to say something to the effect of "hey, it doesn't just happen in Milwaukee."

This seems to me a dangerous practice, because while it may serve the purpose of pointing out that Milwaukee isn't some sort of island of crime and violence in a sea of tranquility it also appears to be, at the surface, a type of acceptance that these things just happen.

Frankly, I'd much rather not be part of the norm with things like this.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Do I Really Live Here?

Sometimes this place makes me sick. As if hearing about the grave robbers who planned on raping a "hot," dead 20-year-old woman wasn't bad enough, I come home to see that:

Monday: As Many as 19 Rape Girl: An 11-year-old girl was sexually assaulted Monday night by as many as 19 males in a house on Milwaukee's north side, according to charges filed in Children's Court.

Hegerty has already said that it's a "societal problem." What societal excuse is there for this kind of behavior? Are you joking me?

I don't know about you, but there isn't a corner of the earth that I know of where murdering mentally challenged people or raping children is acceptable.

"Societies" by nature of the word, don't act like that. I'll go there. I just did. Try starting with civilized groups before you throw around the word "societal."

What's wrong with these people? This is too much to even think about right now. What a disgusting, despicable week for the citizens of Wisconsin and Milwaukee.

Vince Bobot has issues

A big 'ol tip of the hat to Josh Schroeder for pointing out that Vince Bobot's entire platform is based on criticizing David Clarke.

To save you the time, here's a screen-grab from Bobot's website.



What does Vince Bobot stand for?

Apparently pointing out anything his opponent did wrong.

And that's it.

Even my platform for everything is more comprehensive than that!

Drinking Right in the news

MKE Magazine's story on Drinking Right and Drinking Liberally is now available online.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Those who can't do...

Jenna at Right of the Shore checks off items from her back to school list, including a "ten-minute complaint from a professor on how budget cuts have prevented him from creating a course website."

He needed a budget for a website?

Take a look at this thing of beauty known as Ask Me Later.

Total budget for creation and maintenance?

Zero. Zilch. Nada.

Also, I seem to fondly recall a time when not only did classes exist without websites, they didn't even have computers!

Maybe this professor needs to spend a little more time getting back to basics.

(Unless, of course, it's a class on web design.)

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Note to Jackhole

1. Although it's legal to turn on a red, it's not mandatory. Honking at me to do so won't win you any friends.

2. Your Porsche Cayenne is ugly. It looks like a pregnant Carrera.

3. If you're going to be a tough guy behind the wheel of your expensive car, you damned well better know how to drive it. My car cost a fraction of what yours did, but it's a muscle car nonetheless. If you can't keep up with me after you decided to follow me (for flipping you off), you're just going to look like a fool. And if you don't know how to navigate a roundabout, you have some real problems.

4. I have your license plate number. You've made me give greater consideration to posting the plate numbers of all the other inconsiderate and dumbass drivers on the road I come across. Since I know your plate number, I'll be sure to give them all your name so they can express their appreciation.

5. Not to put too fine a point on it, but your car is really, really ugly.

Thank you.

Not so bad...

It's Saturday.

I'm sitting in a Schwartz bookstore enjoying a cup of coffee. I just bought two books. I plan on enjoying these books on my own, sweet time.

I just busted a very large woman checking me out.

I don't have to worry about being anywhere when I don't want to. I can make whatever I want for dinner and not have to worry about someone else's tastes.

It still hurts.

But, in the grand scheme of things, I suppose things could be worse.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Qu'est Que C'est*

Note: This has nothing to do with recent events.

Vikki Ortiz, or, as Ramon would call her, The Vikki, has recently posted on Psycho Chicks.

These are the women who do crazy things – like slash their ex-boyfriend’s tires,
or fall asleep in front of their ex’s apartment door while waiting for them
(even though the ex-boyfriend has moved on and has no idea why she’d be there),
or text message a guy dozens of times before he ever sends one back.


Now, I can tell you from experience, as well as conversations with countless other men, guys generally think all women are psycho. It's nothing personal, really. The truth is that when it comes to interacting with the opposite sex we're generally way out of our league if we even attempt to figure out what's going on in a woman's head.

We tend to classify that as "psycho."

Granted, very few women go to the extremes Vikki describes (thank goodness). And the ones that do tend to earn reputations for doing so (ladies...guys do warn one another). But what men refer to as being "psycho" among the rest of the women out there is actually something many of us find quite endearing. It's an aspect of a woman's personality we grow to appreciate, though we may often times complain about it.

I mean, seriously, what's the deal with shoes?

The point is that women have to sometimes realize that men are fairly simple creatures when compared to the fairer sex. I'm certain this drives them crazy, but that's just the way the cookie crumbles.

(And yes, if the cookie crumbles on to the floor, we will still pick it up and eat it.)

So to the true psycho chicks out there, the very ones Ms. Ortiz describes, consider just how far off the map you are when compared to the rather primitive machinations of the male mind.

And to you guys out there who can't get enough of those ladies, here's some advice:

Run run run run run run run away!*
___________________________________
*If you don't get the reference, go here.