Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Imbibing Properly

Just a reminder that the second Drinking Right will take place Wednesday evening at Eagans, where if they don't pour you a stiff drink, you must be a drunk stiff.

I would also like to extend this invitation to any liberal bloggers out there, because when it comes to drinking, alcohol is the cause of and solution to all of life's problems.

Seriously. It is. I wrote my senior thesis at Marquette all about it.

At least, that's the fuzzy memory.

I will be there by 5pm. It would appear that some believe this is far too early to go out and get your drink on. I would argue that it's far too late. And it's called happy hour for a reason.

Plus, unlike those who drink liberally, us conservative bloggers have jobs and all.

I kid because I love.

Topic for the evening: Slash Fan Fic.

And you thought it was all fat guys smoking cigars lit with blood money.

We leave that for the after-bar.


Monday, May 29, 2006

ITunes will overcharge

Warner Brothers will soon release an album by Paris Hilton, and even if you paid 99 cents for the entire thing, you'd probably be wasting your money.

The next time you hear recording artists and record companies complain about piracy (illegal downloading, not the "arrrgh" kind), think of this: There's a whole lot of crap out there trying to pass itself off as music. And there are a whole lot of idiot record execs shoving talentless nobodies into studios and pouring trunkloads of cash in producing albums that nobody ever wants to hear. And then they scratch their heads and wonder why the thing doesn't sell.

And then they charge you $16 for a CD that has the one song you do want to hear.

Keep in mind that every time you plop down money for the next U2, Metallica or Dexy's Midnight Runners album, you're subsidizing the crap spewing forth from Paris Hilton, Lindsey Loan or that chick from Darcy's Wild Life.

The business model they're using simply sucks. And we keep paying for it. Forget big oil. This deserves a Congressional hearing!

My neighbor is worse than your neighbor

Clint has a great little tale up about a neighbor to whom he affectionately refers as A$$hole. He also invites readers to share their neighbor horror stories. Here's one of mine:

Get that off your yard!
A couple of years ago I had to get rid of an old couch. It was too old to even bother selling, so throwing it away was really my last option. I don't own a truck to take it to the city dump, and didn't want to bother my buddy with the pick-up. So I put it on the front curb to have the Village of Shorewood pick it up (for $40).

I called the Village repeatedly and only got an answering machine. Eventually we just left the information and waited for the couch to disappear. Sure enough, it did.

It also cost twice as much.

Turns out the Village never got my calls. But they did get a call from one of my neighbors complaining about the couch being an eyesore. And when the pick-up is in response to a complaint, the price doubles.

Guess it was easier to complain to the local government than it was to me.

A couple of weeks later, a collapsible bed-frame was on my neighbor's curb. I assumed it was left there for pick-up. One day, as I was driving down my street, I saw the jagged piece of metal sitting on the road. I parked my car, picked it up, and put it back on the curb.

Then I heard yelling coming from the neighbor's house. Apparently it wasn't her junk, but had just been left on her curb. And the appropriate solution to that was moving it to the middle of the street. A three foot long piece of dark metal with sharp edges left right where dozens of cars park daily.


Kane Watch: The Difference

About ten years ago I became fast friends with a fellow I worked with. For a long while we were attached at the hip; the kind of friends where whenever someone saw one of us alone they always asked where the other was. We had a mutual female friend he went out with on a few dates. Things didn't work out between them, but they remained friends.

Then one night he showed up at her house (they lived across the street from one another), and as it was rather late she wasn't interested in talking. That didn't stop him from cornering her and eventually holding her down on the floor as a way of keeping her attention. Fortunately, she lived with her uncle who quickly woke up and kicked him out of the house.

And our friendship came to an immediate end.

I'm thinking that might be the difference between me and Eugene Kane.

Friday, May 26, 2006

(Un)Official Invite

Ask Me Later cordially invites you to Drinking Right.

I know it's going to be somewhere not everyone is crazy about, but until we're official, this is the best I have to offer.

Wednesdy, May 31st, 2006, 5 pm.

Eagans , with the largest back-bar in Wisconsin, serves as an excellent host for this occasion.

Be there, or be square.

Literally, you'll turn into a square if you don't show up. I mean it. I know voodoo.


We now interrupt weather with weather

Tim Cuprisin seems to miss the point when discussing weather coverage by local television stations. On his blog he says:

There are only two stories that suck in viewers in this market: The Packers and
the weather. Channel 4 and Channel 12 both have consistently been playing up the
weather because it's clear that when there's bad weather, viewership goes up.

The difference between the Packers and the weather is that people typically actually tune in hoping to watch the Packer game. I would argue the true reason behind viewership going up during bad weather is that people simply have to stay inside. To keep themselves entertained, they turn on the ol' boob tube. That they do so in hopes of watching the weather that's keeping them inside in the first place is doubtful.

But where Cuprisin misses the point is in how he responds to a reader's comment that the local station took over so much of the screen to track a storm. As I asked in this post, is it really necessary to take up 1/5th of a television screen to let viewers know there's a thunderstorm warning, especially when a quarter of that is the station's logo?

Nobody's saying the stations shouldn't provide the information, just that maybe they should be more considerate of why viewers are tuning in in the first place.

Sorry, Tim, it ain't the weather.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Jim Ott

I don't live in 23rd Assembly District, but my parents do. And I can guaranty you that I will encourage them to vote for Jim Ott.

I like his platform. I wish he could represent me. But most of all, he's not a career politician (at least not yet). He has real-world experience I would love to see applied to government.

If you're in his district, check him out and give him your support.


Is it really necessary to take up 1/5th of a television screen to let viewers know there's a thunderstorm warning?

What about when nearly a quarter of that is the station's logo?

One summer some years back I was trying to watch a rerun of The Simpsons that I had missed when it originally ran. There was an impending storm. Fox 6 broke into the episode repeatedly to make the audience aware of this. After having the episode interrupted five times in a period of ten minutes (oddly enough, the commercials ran uninterrupted), I finally called to complain.

I was told that they provide the information because it's what viewers want to see. Besides, Summerfest was going on, and it was important to let attendees know that a storm may hit at any moment.

Nevermind that those attendees WERE AT SUMMERFEST!

Kane Watch: You can't have it both ways, either.

So Eugene is back at it. That always incites me to write a little something for the blog, even if I have been a bit lazy recently. I'm sure that by now everyone's heard of the brilliant idea to reform the requirements for admission to UW schools.

Apparently it's been quite a shocker that the UW school system has based its enrollment on, "set academic requirements such as grade point averages and test scores to make the majority of admissions decisions." Who would have thought? An institution of higher learning that asks of its students to have a track record of dedication to schoolwork. Astonishing.

However, since that system is apparently not good enough, some bleeding heart liberal somewhere decided that more factors need to be considered. These factors include, "changing its admissions policies to consider race, income and other non-academic qualities of applicants with the explicit goal of boosting student diversity."

I guess I wouldn't be so surprised by all of this were it not for Eugene Kane's reaction. He begins today's column by stating, "Some folks should make up their minds what they expect out of the education system in this city."

I think Gene should make up his mind on what he wants. To be sure, he argues:

"It's always peculiar to note that some of the voices attacking increased diversity in college enrollment are the same type of privileged white professionals who got into college due to family connections as opposed to strict merit."

Yet he concludes, "If you're truly interested in preserving the future of our community with better educational opportunity for the students who need it most, you can't argue against diversity programs without leaving a huge gap in your logic."

I think the gap in logic here is that if it's wrong for "privileged white professionals" to get into college because of their last names and not because of their grades, then it's also wrong for underprivileged kids to get into college because of the color of their skin or level of income and not for their grades.

You can't have it both ways, Gene. It's either wrong to consider factors other than grades or it's not. It's that simple.

Furthermore, it makes no sense to me to penalize a white, middle class kid who worked her ass off to become valedictorian (assuming the liberals haven't gotten to that school yet and done away with valedictorian) and deny her admission to a program because her parents actually cared about her.

How can it be that we live in a world that would force schools to ignore the grades of its prospects. That's like asking basketball teams to ignore the talent of its recruits.

Either we will end up with the best and the brightest who will someday lead this country or we'll end up with a bunch of meaningless college diplomas and a society that's grossly uneducated. I worked for my education. I guess that makes me a hard ass to expect others to work for theirs.

So be it.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006


When Ramon looks at the women, he sees the things that the other men often do not see. When he sees them, he feels bad. There is not a reason why he should feel bad, but he does. Maybe it has something to do with his power to see the future. When the Avril she was a little girl doing the punk, he knew she would someday be the big girl doing the stuff.

Here, she does the stuff.

Good for Avril, even though she doesn't know how to spell the month. Or her parents don't. Same thing. There is a 'p.' When I say her name, my tongue gets crazy. Don't you get crazy. I know my tongue doing the crazy makes everyone crazy, but you must stop.

Ramon out!

'Nuff Said

Thanks, Nick.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

No Soup

Those who argue that the solution to illegal immigration is found in punishing employers who provide jobs to "undocumented" workers make a good case.

If the jobs dry up, then what's the point in coming here?

So if the idea is removing the appeal of entering the country illegally, wouldn't it stand to reason that any benefit illegal immigrants receive should be rescinded as well?

No more subsidized health care. No public education. No drivers' licenses. No banks providing home loans. No more law enforcement agencies ignoring the law.

Quite simply, make coming here illegally as unappealing as possible.

Seriously, it's that simple.

Just good enough

Anyone who's ever dealt with the Wisconsin DMV knows just how piss-poor it is at accomplishing any given task. Sure, if you need your plates renewed or a new driver's license, you'll eventually get it. But it seems the department never strives to achieve anything better than just good enough.

It's so bad, in fact, that the JS Editorial Board can leigitmately use the DMV's near inability to do its job now as a reason to speak out against federal requirements for drivers' licensing.

Any private business so inable to meet the demands and reality of the marketplace would go bankrupt so quickly one would wonder how it ever raised the capital to go into business in the first place. And here's a government-run agency providing services mandated by law and with the benefit of being supported by taxes that can't institute a new program in seven years.

That's just pathetic. If you ever want an example of what's wrong with government, here's a good one.

On the flip-side, Clint poins out:
So our own government can’t do squat about ID’s in 7 more years and 12
years after 9/11, but there is suppose to be peace in Iraq and all of our
troops should be home in 7 months?

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Confusion About Iran's Alleged Non-Muslim Dress Code

A report out of Canada confirmed that Iran recently passed a law requiring non-Muslims to wear identification markers on their clothing. In light of this report, many people have weighed in on such a despicable move by the Iranian government. I hate to put a stop to all the fun, but this story may not be entirely true.

It is true that a bill was given initial approval by the Irani parliament that will serve to encourage Islamic dress, particularly as it pertains to women. However, this bill does not also require that non-Muslims be singled out with special badges. New information is making this seem to be nothing more than a terrible rumor.

The Irani government has denied all claims that such a bill was discussed or passed. Granted, it's hard to believe anything they say these days, Dr. Zin of Regime Change Iran reminds us that:

Ahmadinejad wants a national dress policy for Iran, but thus far it is only talk. This report, that includes identifying religious minorities with badges has NOT been part of the public debate in the past. It is possible that this will be part of the debate in the future, but the actual text of the dress code proposals do NOT include this language at this time. Ultimately, the decision on such a proposal will be in the hands of the Supreme Leader. So this story if accurate is a long way off from implementation.

Ahmadinejad may be a total nut job and anti-Semite, but we cannot forget the history of Iran and its people which includes a vast welcoming of other religions. In fact, for the better part of the Middle Eastern "situation", Iran and Israel were not enemies. Iranians have pride in the fact that their country (especially under the Shah) welcomed people of all religions.

As such, it does not go well with the national fabric of the people of Iran to discriminate in such a manner. In fact, it would be a horrible internal political move. Ahmadinejad who is already facing criticism from his constituents would not do well to cast them in a light that is reminiscent of Hitler and the Nazis.

World Trade Center

The first clips from Oliver Stone's new film have been released. See the preview here.

How does she rate?

McCain Gets Cantankerous Reception at Commencement


Not only does she throw the man a reception, but she doesn't even bother telling me about it!

Friday, May 19, 2006

Xoff: Hating the Constitution

Bill Christofferson is really on a roll with just how much he hates the Bill of Rights, or at least part of it.

Worshipers of the Second Amendment? Gun nuts? He's obviously not too crazy about the rights guaranteed in the Constitution. I could understand if maybe he took issue with how the amendment was interpreted, but I get the feeling he simply wishes it wasn't there.

As a former journalist, I wonder if he's a worshiper of the First Amendment? And his thoughts on wiretapping certainly seem to make him a worshiper of the Fourth.

And by Bill's apparent definition of "worship," I guess that also makes him a nut.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

XOff: Stuck on Stupid

Bill Christofferson must have bumped his head, as a few of his recent posts make points so ridiculous that I simply can't overlook them (as I normally would) just because we're obviously from different ends of the political spectrum.

First off, there's this gem, where he references some folks called the Gun Guys while bringing to light the apparent injustice of the Wayne LaPierre's salary:

The Gun Guys, the NRA's nemesis, wonder what the average salary of NRA members is, after revealing that NRA President Wayne LaPierre pulls down a million dollars a year in salary and perks. The Gun Guys calculate that it takes the
dues of 35,000 members just to pay him.

Nevermind that membership in the NRA is entirely voluntary, unlike the dues so many blue-collar workers pay to their unions.

Then you have what's nothing more than silliness when Christofferson takes issue with State Sen. Joe Leibham. The blog post he links to begins with:

Senator Joe Leibham issued a press release yesterday saying he created a new
Great Lakes Caucus for state legislators that have districts along one of the
Great Lakes. It must be election season since during the rest of the year,
Leibham doesn't seem very interested in protecting our Great Lakes.

Now I can understand how Bill might want to expose Liebham's election-year posturing, but the entire content of what he has to say is:

State Sen. Joe Leibham, R-Sheboygan, is an election-year environmentalist, Carrie
Lynch says.
But didn't there used to be five Great Lakes?
Leibham only acknowledges two.

Personally, it's nice to see a state legislatotor staying within his boundaries. After all, while there may be five Great Lakes, only two border Wisconsin. And as Carrie Lynch writes, the caucus is for "state legislators that have districts along one of the Great Lakes." Imagine that! State-level government actually doing something at the state level, as opposed to pretending to be a federal level foreign ambassador.

Finally, we have the straw that broke the camel's back. It's the thing that made me say out loud, "Is Christofferson stuck on stupid?" and scare the crap out of my dog. Fortunately, my dog eats his own poop, so there wasn't much for me to clean up.

It's the story of a Missouri town not allowing an unmarried couple with three children some sort of residency permit because too many unrelated people are living under one roof. I'll say right now that's a f***ed up law, but Bill couldn't resist getting a dig in on F. Jim with:

If Jim Sensenbrenner were mayor, kids born in Black Jack would be able to stay
but their parents would be deported.

Jimminy Cricket almighty...does he even understand the issue of illegal immigration and what so many Americans are upset about? Or is it just easier to take a completely unrelated, albeit interesting and compelling story, and straw-man Sensenbrenner's argument so far away from legitimacy that it somehow makes sense in XOff's world?

Wait...I think I answered my own question. Maybe I'm the one that's stuck...

Wanna be pissed?

If you're among the masses upset over The Da Vinci Code, I have a couple of recommendations for you.

First, breath. Calm down. It's a movie. And from what I've read, not a very good one. It won't destroy Christianity. If anything, it's giving the Church publicity and an opportunity to discuss its faith.

Second, read Lamb : The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. If you're so upset about Dan Brown questioning the veracity of the Church, check out what Christopher Moore has to say about J.C. himself.

The first time I saw the man who would save the world he was sitting near the
central well in Nazareth with a lizard hanging out of his mouth. Just
the tail end and the hind legs were visible on the outside; the head and
forelegs were halfway down the hatch. He was six, like me, and his beard
had not come in fully, so he didn't look much like the pictures you've seen of
him. His eyes were like dark honey, and they smiled at me out of a mop of
blue-black curls that framed his face. There was a light older than Moses
in those eyes.

"Unclean! Unclean!" I screamed, pointing at the boy so my mother would see that I knew the Law, but she ignored me, as did all the other mothers who were filling their jars at the well.

The boy took the lizard from his mouth and handed it to his younger brother, who sat beside him in the sand. The younger boy played with the lizard for a while, teasing it until it reared its little head as if to bite, then he picked up a rock and smashed the creature's head. Bewildered, he pused the dead lizard around in the sand, and once assured that it wasn't going anywhere on its own, he picked it up and handed it back to his older brother.

Into his mouth went the lizard, and before I could accuse, out it came again, squirming alive and ready to bite once again. He handed it back to his younger brother who smote it mightly with the rock, starting the whole process again.

I watched the lizard die three more times before I said, "I want to do that too."

The Savior removed the lizard from his mouth and said, "Which part?"

By the way, his name was Joshua. Jesus is the Greek translation of the Hebrew Yeshua, which is Joshua. Christ is not a last name. It's the Greek for messiah, a Hebrew word meaning anointed. I have no idea what the "H" in Jesus H. Christ stood for. It's one of the things I should have asked him.

If you drive by my house, I'm going to kill your ass

Should this "gentleman" be re-elected (if he isn't recalled first), Mini McGee's constituency should be reminded that they get the government they deserve.

[h/t Phelony Jones]

Monday, May 15, 2006

Casper Never Learns

Another installment for Casper's Most Embarassing Moments:

I went out of my way to shop at the Metro Market tonight because the normal place I go to is on a certain list. And I was buying in bulk, so I didn't want to pay Sendik's prices.

I'm making Italian Beef and Sausages for a work pot-luck. I figure if I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it right. So I needed a total of about 9 pounds of meat. They wrapped it in four different packages.

As I stood at the register, some of the beef rolled over that little divider bar to keep your groceries from touching anyone elses groceries...onto someone else's groceries.

"Excuse me," I said, "looks like you're getting some of my meat."

At Metro Market.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

The S**T keeps piling up...

Two more additions to The S**T List:

Clint isn't too happy about Water Street Brewery.

And I should have known just how bad Taco Bell's S**T is.

I am very surprised!

A cabbie was mistaken for his fare when the BBC started interviewing him and not his passenger, Guy Kewney, editor of Newswireless.net.

Read the full story here and be sure to watch the video.

Watch it once. The rewatch it frame-by-frame from :04 to :09. I think you actually get to see the detailed development of horror!

Saturday, May 13, 2006

I'm saying it wasn't romantic, that's what I'm saying

-Milwaukee Alderman Michael McGee, Jr.

Mr. McGee is a public official.

-Circuit Judge Clare Fiorenza

Friday, May 12, 2006

Everyone's Talkin' Tommy

Everywhere I turn, it seems Tommy Thompson is the topic of discussion. From Sykes to Belling and the Spice Girls, Tommy is everywhere.

I can't help myself from saying so, but you heard it here first.


Wednesday, May 10, 2006


While the debate in Milwaukee seems to be over replacing buses with less versatile buses, Hawaii is tackling its own issues with mass transit by proposing to replace air travel with boats.

Frankly, it seems the problem they face is a lot bigger than ours. Here we are discussing how difficult it is to get from one side of town to the other while they can't get from one county to the next without hopping on a plane!

Ultimately, though, their proposed resolution (which is also taking advantage of federal funds) has a much better name: The Superferry!

(Okay...maybe not such a good name.)

Ooooh! Ooooh! I just had a flashback to something from my childhood! Citizens of Milwaukee, how about we do something like this?

Kane Watch: Talkin' Facts

Does anyone else find it ironic that the same race-baiting columnist who stated that, "There is competition for jobs, but frankly I don't see many African-Americans willing to volunteer for the kind of low-paying agricultural work many Hispanic immigrants regularly perform,"now concerns himself with the facts about illegal immigrants?

Give me a break.

Anyone who was truly interested in the facts about illegal immigrants would never have made such a racist claim that they only work low-paying agricultural jobs.

Too little, too late Gene.

Mayor Barrett Takes One for the Team

It's not often I find myself saying this, but way to go Mayor Barrett. His veto of the ridiculous Milwaukee Connector has set the tone for politicians who hope to move forward with exorbitant projects before giving any answers as to how they'll be funded.

Council President Willie Hines was not happy with the decision, saying, "When the business leaders and citizens of this city looked to Mayor Barrett for leadership, he offered none. It's disappointing that when the City of Milwaukee had the opportunity to move into the 21st century, this mayor is driving a Studebaker stuck in the 1950s."

Sorry Mr. Hines, but Barrett stayed true to the tax payers.

Aside from the obvious problems the Milwaukee Connector brings, such as longer walks between stops, less flexibility on routes, and taking away already scarce parking, there's the biggest factor of all which remains unanswered: "Specifically, Barrett said backers of the plan had not detailed where the $57 million local share of the project would come from, or what they would do if federal money fell short of the expected $243 million."

I don't know that I agree with Willie Hines that the Milwaukee Connector was the means to move into the 21st century, but one thing's for sure: I am happy that Mayor Barrett is demanding more answers before plans move ahead.

More of Casper's Most Embarassing Moments

At about three o'clock today I was interviewing a candidate for a temp position in my department when I happened to look down at my feet and notice something that had escaped my attention all day long.

I was wearing two different shoes.

Fortunately they were both black dress shoes of similar styles. Unfortunately, one had a much thicker sole than the other.

Silly me...I just thought I was getting taller...one leg at a time.


(Hey...today you get two for the price of one!)

Some years back I was hosting a party and starting chatting up an attractive Asian girl. At one point in the conversation I asked her what nationality she was.

"Korean," she said.

Being the smooth guy I am, I replied, "Oh yeah? I used to watch a lot of MASH."

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

S**T List Update

Check it out here.

Behind the Scenes at the Journal Sentinel

O. Ricardo Pimentel: Hey guys, why don't you take a seat.

Cary Spivak: We'd prefer to stand.

Dan Bice: Um...yeah, we'll stand.

ORP: Are you sure?

CS: Yeah, we're sure.

DB: What he says.

ORC: Um...okay, if you'd rather...

CS & DB: We're together on this.

DB: Jinx! Buy me a Coke!

CS: Damn you!

ORP: Heh heh, yeah, that's funny.

DB: We do that all the time!

CS: At least, ever since I said we would.

ORP: Yeah...um...yeah...okay...well...Listen, I wanted to run something past you two.

CS: We don't write alone. We're a team.

DB: Yeah

ORP: No, no, it's nothing like that.

CS: Just so we're clear....

ORP: No...I got ya'. It's nothing like that. In fact, I want to leverage off your reputation and expand what you do into a new venue.

DB: Ooooh! Ooooh! Are we gonna be on Sykes' show?

CS: SHUSH! What did I tell you?

DB: Sorry...

ORP: I wish! No...that's not it at all. I want you to start a blog.

DB: A what?

ORP: A blog.

CS: Huh?

ORP: A blog.

CS: What the hell is that?

ORP: A web log. It's a way of sharing your opinions on a more regular basis.

DB: Ooooh...that sounds good.

CS: Shut up!

DB: Sorry.

ORP: Gene has one.

DB: Who?

ORP: Gene...Gene Kane.

CS: Sorry...you lost us.

ORP: Eugene Kane. About yay high, close shaved head, glasses...

DB: Still totally lost.

ORP: The black guy.

DB & CS: Oh yeah! Him!

CS: Jinx! Buy me a...

ORP: STOP! Anyway...yeah, him...either way, he has one. Seems to have worked out well for him. Lets him share his thoughts outside of his regular column and all.

CS: You paying by the word for this, or by column?

ORP: Well...um...there's no more pay in it. Just a way for you two to...

CS: I don't like these "blog" things.

DB: It might not be such a bad idea...

CS: Shut it!

ORP: As I was saying, it's just a way for you two to express yourselves outside of the normal column. No editors, no...

CS: Whatever we want to say?

DB: About anything?

ORP: Sure...within reason.

CS: I hate blogs.

ORP: Well, y'know, I don't think that's the best approach...

DB: I hate blogs too!

ORP: Listen, I'm not sure that's going to make your blog the most popular...

CS: Do you know who we are? If we hate blogs, then everyone should hate blogs!

DB: Yeah!

ORP: Well, I appreciate your view on this, but it seems that you could attract more readers if...

DB: We should write a blog about just how crappy blogs are!

CS: I was thinking the same thing! Jinx!

DB: Hey! You didn't say it!

CS: No! No! I was thinking it! That counts!

ORP: If that's what you want to do, that's fine, but I'm not sure if...



ORP: Okay, if that's where you want to take this, but I'm not sure if that's the best route....

CS: I don't get it, but I hate it.

DB: When do we start?

ORP: Ummm...maybe we should talk more about this...

CS: NO! I hate blogs! I want to blog about how useless blogs are!

DB: I agree! But Cary, don't you think we should...

CS: Shuuuuut it.

DB: I hate blogs!

ORP: (Good lord, I hope they can't remember their passwords)

Monday, May 08, 2006

Sayin' It Like It Is

This is one of the hottest pictures I've seen in a long time.

Cuz, y'know I really dig horses.

But it's even better when you have an overactive imagination involving John Wayne, Clint Eastwood and a week in Argentina leading to a shootout that would put Butch and Sundance to shame.

So, I'm thinking of setting up a PayPal account to take care of my therapy costs. I wonder, do we have enough readers?

Kane Watch: Makin' It Easy

Eugene Kane further demonstrates his belief that the color of one's skin is more important than the content of their character.

It just seems right [that blacks are taking ownership over professional sport teams], considering in sports like basketball and football, black athletes make up a significant part of the action on the playing field.

So, obviously, by Kane's standards, white ownership of teams is inappropriate as it doesn't properly reflect the skin color of their most visible employees.

Let's consider a situation where a major corporation is selecting its next CEO. The candidates have been narrowed down to two, one black, one white.

And let's say the black candidate demonstrates far greater qualifications than the white candidate, but the employees of the company are predominantly white.

According to Kane's logic, hiring the white candidate would "just seem right."

Spread this around...

The following is posted on The Confidentials and taken from a neigborhood watch group website:

Last night at about 9.30pm my family and I were returning home, we noticed
several small groups of young black males on Vine between 52nd and 53rd. We
turned into the alley between 52nd and 53rd and saw a Chevy van parked on an
apron, we pulled up just past the van and all of the black males then walked
into the alley just behind us, there were about 10-12 of them. My husband called
the police on his cell to inform them of suspicious behavior at which point the
gang began to chase us north up the alley, they pursued us on foot and obviously
we kept in front of them, about ¾ of the way up the alley they cut through to
52nd and assumedly met the van which had reversed out of the alley and driven up
52nd. We saw the van on52nd and Lloyd and took down the license plate at which
point the van began to pursue us, then then pulled along side and attempted to
run us off the road, we were on the phone to 911 the whole time, giving
directions and plate number etc, the 911 operators response was mostly along the
lines of “uh huh” . We then chased the van for several blocks, giving 911
details on where they were and the direction in which they were heading but the
police failed to show up during this time, we finally gave up chase and came
home. We then waited for the squad to come that we had requested to report this
incident and the squad also never arrived, we waited until 10.45 (an hour and 15
minutes) then called and were told that if we couldn’t wait up any longer they
would cancel the the car. I will be calling the alderman this morning to report
both this incident and the lack of police response to it.

Citizens of Milwaukee should be outraged by the lack of police response. This story needs to get out there.

Kane Watch: Yesterday and Today

Mexican men and women full of dignity, willpower and a capacity for work are doing the work that not even blacks want to do in the United States.

-Vincente Fox, as quoted in a May 19, 2005, Eugene Kane column. Read the rest of the column for Kane's take on Fox's statement.

There is competition for jobs, but frankly I don't see many African-Americans willing to volunteer for the kind of low-paying agricultural work many Hispanic immigrants regularly perform.

-Eugene Kane, May 6, 2006.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Xoff Honors Flight 93 Heroes

Not surprising that Xoff would find amusement in President Bush's statement that:
"I believe that it was the first counter-attack to World War III."
-- George W. Bush, on the revolt of Flight 93 passengers against their hijackers on 9/11.

I think the post Bill links to (and I am assuming is a reflection of his own opinion) has it completely backwards.

If Bush referred to it as WWIII, I believe the intention was to reflect the mindset of our enemies. It's the terrorits who thought (and still think) they were starting World War III.

I know this may come as a shock to liberals who prefer to stick their heads in the sand and pretend that someday we'll all hold hands and sing Marley songs together and that extremist Muslims really do like Americans after all and that our country should have done nothing in response to the act of war that was brought upon us...But yes, I'm going to go ahead and say I really do think terrorists believe they are in a battle for the world.

Or, let's play devil's advocate. Was Bush wrong to refer to it as the start of World War III? Hmmm. Let me think about that...let's see there were of course the attacks in the US, and then there was Madrid and after that was London....seems kind of, oh I donno, like a world war to me. Hey Bill, have you read any of Ahmadinejad's comments lately?

Anyway, that Bush. What a crazy guy.

Those Muslim extremists, I'm sure they only wanted to attack America once. So, we should just forgive and forget and move on.

I'm going to go vomit now. It disgusts me to see that the heroes of United 93 are being used for political fodder by the Xoff's of the world.

Because, for the record, Bush was asked about the movie and a statement made by one of the victims' parents who first claimed that it was the first counter-attack to WWIII. All Bush did was agree.

You know, I wonder if Bill's even seen the movie. I highly doubt it. I have yet to find a liberal who had the courage to go see it. It seems they don't like to remember what's at stake, what we lost and just how much we do have to fight for.

Kane Watch: Don't Let the Facts Get in the Way

Sound the alarm! Eugene Kane has a major problem with the way African Americans are responding to the Immigration issue. Yes, it seems to Kane that blacks are beginning to sound like whites! (Whatever that means) Oh the horror.

To be sure, Kane writes, "The uncomfortable truth about the current immigration controversy is the exposure of attitudes by some African-Americans that are uncomfortably similar to those of white Americans who are fed up with the perception that illegal immigrants have been streaming across the border to take away available jobs."

Amazingly, if Gene were to look at the facts without noticing the skin color of those polled, he may see that it means a larger group of of Americans are fed up with illegal immigrants streaming across the border to take away available jobs.

But it's just so much more fun to make it a black/white/brown controversy, I imagine. Hey, gotta sell papers somehow.

I've got to admit, Kane certainly has an interesting stance. This may be one of the few times I've seen him deviate from the masses. Especially if the polls are true in that:

-Nearly twice as many blacks as whites by percentage said they or a family member had lost a job or not been hired because an employer had hired an immigrant.

-The poll also found blacks were more likely than whites to feel that immigrants take jobs from U.S. citizens.

Wouldn't it stand to reason that Kane would argue against illegal immigration? Apparently not. It seems more important to Kane to "not sound white" than it is to look at the facts and protect the jobs of Americans.

And I love the racial stereotype Kane throws into the mix: There is competition for jobs, but frankly I don't see many African-Americans willing to volunteer for the kind of low-paying agricultural work many Hispanic immigrants regularly perform.

Ouch. To the best of my knowledge illegal Hispanic immigrants are capable of and work many types of jobs including but not limited to construction, hospitality services, farmhands, janitorial services, factory work, food service industry work, and much more.

Would African-Americans be willing to volunteer for those kinds of jobs, I'd like to ask Mr. Kane. If those are the kinds of jobs illegal immigrants are taking would you take a stance against illegal immigration then?

I'm really hammering this point because Kane goes on to talk about
"sensational hype over illegal immigration," and I think his stereotype that illegal immigrants only work the fields may just be the most extreme case of that. Ultimately, this dangerous stereotype is the basis for his reasoning that illegal immigrants are no threat to Americans looking for work.

I think Kane may have to go back and double check the facts. Even at the risk of "sounding white."

The Devil Came Up From Mexico

Where are you, you bunch of lilly livered, pantywaist, forked tongued, sorry excuses for defenders of The Constitution? Have you been drinking the water out of the Potomac again?
-Charlie Daniels on illegal immigration.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Wanted: Unhappy Consumers

The old saying goes, "If you like our service, tell others; if you don't, tell us." The reality is that quite the opposite happens. And it happens here. There's no reason consumers should give up their hard-earned dollars to businesses that are unappreciative and unwilling to meet their customers' demands.

So goes the description of The S**T List, another blog of mine that's dedicated to pointing out some of the crappy service and products available to Milwaukee-area consumers.

I'm a stickler for good customer service and business that not only serve, but appreciate, their clientele. Don't take that to mean I'm demanding, just that I think businesses shouldn't get away with taking their customers for granted. Typically I'll let a business know when I think they've done something wrong or haven't met my expectations. It's only fair they're given the opportunity to correct it. But when that input goes unnoticed, it's time to turn things up a notch.

Sure, I could file my complaints right here on Ask Me Later, but I felt that an outlet dedicated to the topic was more appropriate and would serve as a better source for those wanting to know what places to stay away from.

Fortunately, though, I come across relatively few situations I think worthy of adding to the S**T list. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean they don't exist. So I'm looking for a few co-contributors to the blog who are willing to serve as "consumer cops." If you're out there, and would like to have access to this new venue, let me know. All I ask it that you keep in mind that The S**T List is simply a place to share your bad experiences as an average consumer.

To apply, just send an e-mail to casperaskmelater@yahoo.com with a sampling of what you might like to contribute. If selected (and, trust me, you most likely will be), your contribution will be published and an invitation to join will be sent.

So, go out, get bad service and let me know!

Wal-Mart Sucks

If and when the day arrives where Wal-Mart starts paying its employees what so many of its critics demand, I would expect a good portion of its current staff to be receiving pink slips shortly thereafter.

By increasing pay and benefits, it would seem Wal-Mart would in turn be able to attract a higher caliber of employee. Short of that, it could certainly increase the expectations it places on the people that work there now.

Did it ever occur anyone that Wal-Mart gets what it pays for? Or that the employees it has are only worth what Wal-Mart is willing to pay them?

I'm talking about clerks, cashiers and stockers who don't seem to have a problem with loudly using four-letter words in conversations with one another. Or who see fit to ignore a customer at their register while crudely questioning the sexuality of a co-worker. Or who have to have it pointed out to them by a patron that they just said "next" at the so-called "customer service" desk and shouldn't proceed to start up a conversation with the cashier next to them while the customer waits for it to finish.

These aren't training issues. These are issues of common sense. They are examples of behavior lacking in the simple decency any employer should expect a person to bring to the table before training even starts.

Maybe Wal-Mart's critics need to stop complaining about the mega-retailer and start praising it. Because without Wal-Mart, where would the very bottom of America's employable work?

Keith Richards to Translate

Furvel roght jon 138 after oble step giga in arder to enxt]er he CXS PX Jay Tunnel laft.

-From Patrick Kennedy's post-accident statement to the police (last page).

Friday, May 05, 2006

Renee Banot is hot

I had the opportunity to see Renee Banot in person today.

In a relative sense, television and photography do nothing for her.

Hummanah hummanah hummanah.

Down with the big GJD

Aaron is looking for people to sign a petition regarding Doyle's stupid...yeah, I said stupid...posturing against oil companies.

If you know what's good for you, you should sign it. If you don't know what's good for you but you wake up in the morning and log on to the internet in hope of finding out what's good for you, I'm telling you to sign it. If you have nothing better to do, have no opinion on current gas prices in the state of Wisconsin (which, by the way, are more expensive than our nearly more expensive for everything neighbor to our south) and just want to feel like you belong, SIGN IT!

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Ramon he is full of the culture

The museums are full of the things that make Ramon cry and they are the things that make him laugh but there is only one of the museums that make him laugh and cry at the same time.

Ramon will be dancing for flight fare to his favoritest of all of the museums and maybe a mai-tai.

Would you like to come with Ramon?

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

I'm never satisfied

This is what I drive to work:

This is what I'd rather "drive" to work:

Not only would my commute be much easier, but meetings would be however long I insist upon them being and I'm pretty sure I'd get a raise every two hours.

Just because, you know, I said so.

I'm not a geek!

I've kissed girls! Real, live girls! And they had all their limbs and stuff!

But that doesn't stop me from thinking this is one of the coolest things I've seen in a long time.

And that this is one of the saddest.

I'm thinking of starting a series called Casper's Most Embarassing Moments.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Screw 'em. Screw 'em all.

Sometimes you just get in that mood.

Am I ever in that mood.

And I mean it. All of 'em. Each and every one of 'em.

Ever feel that way?

Monday, May 01, 2006

It's all your fault!

If you didn't join in on today's celebration of Day Without Illegals, then you missed out on not only celebrating a potentially new holiday, but on what I feel safe in qualifying as Milwaukee's first Conservatively Drinking.

Which is anything but.

And you missed out on Aaron defending his way of meeting new friends to an astoundingly understanding Kelly.

And you didn't get to meet the graciously gorgeous Phelony Jones.

Most important, you failed to witness Ramon Fabulosa wondering where in the world was Elliot.

So, what I'm trying to say is that it was your loss.

But next time it doesn't have to be.